I woke up at 1 pm after my first night in NYC. Two hours later I was sitting where I woke up, freshly showered, with a screwdriver in my hand watching last night's 'The Office' and '30 Rock' shows. 4 more of those drinks and I hopped out onto Manhattan Ave in Brooklyn during the middle of rush hour. I got a fresh pack of smokes and a slice of pepperoni down the block and jumped on the 61 bus to head to the bar where my friend was working.
I made it to the bar and pulled up a stool. Over the next 5 hours I drank half the bars' supply of Miller Lite and endulged in the complementary tater tots the bar served. We all left around 11pm and made our way into the city after hearing Springsteen on the jukebox and almost puking. The first stop was some dive bar joint in the lower east side called the Holiday Cocktail lounge. The bathroom there was so small I almost knocked myself over trying to get inside the door and wedge myself by the toilet to go piss. The bar seemed to be run by two older dudes who like to close around 1230am. They had cheap Bud bottles and wood panel walls that reminded me of my parents basement. As last call was over and we we're on our way out we heard Springsteen and I had to piss again and it was that same fucking song again.
Some minutes later we were sitting at a booth at Doc Holidays which I think was pretty close to where we were before. The bartender had tits that extended farther than the average persons arms and if you think that's good then ok. We drank PBR which put Drummer Floor Guy into death throes and he was on his way to the L train soon thereafter. Tiny E and I stuck it out, and after another 16oz of PBR we started walking again after hearing that same fucking Springsteen song. The next stop was on Avenue B; the place might have even been called Ave B, but they served 8 oz ponies for 2 bucks. We each got 2, and I took a piss in a bathroom that had Bloc Party sticker on the toilet. We weren't there long as we hopped in a cab and headed to a place called Happy Endings. I had to piss again after we ordered 2 Bud's and I stood in line next to some dude named Philmo. We were standing in line to the one unisex bathroom and he was with some chick that looked like a blonde version of Hilary Swank, but the sort of version that would be with a 60 inch dude named Philmo.
Tiny E realizes he is no longer in possession of his Ipod and we figure that it must have popped out of his jacket at Doc Holiday's. I thought it was a longshot, but we headed back around 23oam. The place was less busy and we made a beeline for the booth we were in earlier. The Ipod was wedged between the booth and the wall and we ordered 2 more PBRs after that victory. As the bar was closing we headed down the street and found our way to a pizza joint. I had slice of pepperoni and we made out way to the subway. I get down inside the station and I see a figure approaching as I am eating my pizza. Up walks a man dressed in woman's clothes and he asks what I am up to tonight. I mumble something with a mouthful and he asks if I am 'looking for a good time.' I laugh and he is on his way. I passed out around 5am.
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